Friday, July 15, 2005

"I Don't Recognize Her."

From uber-bitchy gossip aficionado Ted Casablanca:

Speaking of Tom, superinside sources connected out the friggin' wazoo tell me intended bride Katie Holmes is not experiencing from her family the smooth love-slide for Tommy-boy she would like. Ohioans in overdrive tell me Katie was expecting an all-aboard approval. Didn't exactly happen.

Yes, yes, yes, Katie's very happy. I know this. That's what K.H.'s peeps have been proclaiming fer weeks (just seems like eons). I'm sure it's true. But as I'm sure you gossipy folks have heard at this overgabbed point, Katie's family is reportedly a different story: "I don't recognize her."

And the kicker quote:

Finally saw War of the Worlds, by the by. Fabulous! However, look. If Tom Cruise makes one more bullet-ridden shoot-'em-to-death movie (à la The Last Samurai) and emerges for the epilogue like some do-me Rolling Stone cover, all dusty come-hither heroism with requisite facial scratches for beauty marks, I'm gonna lose it!

Die, you idiot, then maybe you'll finally get that damn Oscar (even though I seem to be the only one in the world thinking you richly deserve one). Do I need to remind you that your beloved ex Nic finally nabbed her statuette for drowning her depressed ass in The Hours? Love ya, mean it.

Okay, so I put that last bit in just to be mean.


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